Reasons Like Seasons

I was going to tell you to stay Not sure if I’ve told you before Told you so you’d really hear me Told you so that you’d understand Understand that I am being torn apart By fear By scorn By fractured expectations That we would grow old together Watch our parents die And our children grow Holding each other up along the way But now you’ve torn away my handrails Telling me that what we have is not enough Or too much And in all the wrong places But I couldn’t fit it all In the space between You putting on your shoes And you walking out the door

When   you  are with me, I am scared. Scared of what is going to happen. Scared of what is going to come out of my mouth. Scared that I will say everything or nothing, And scared of the consequences of either and both and everything. When   you  are away, I miss  you . I want to know what  you  are doing. I want to know what  you  are thinking. I want to know that  you  know that I am still here, And desperate to be with  you  again. Moments are unbearable In the silent spaces between our breaths, In the empty hours of parting, In the cluttered chasms of thought. And I want to be with  you , Scared, missing, and incomplete. I want  you  and all of the desperate consequences. I want  you  with me.

When   you  are with me, I am scared. Scared of what is going to happen. Scared of what is going to come out of my mouth. Scared that I will say everything or nothing, And scared of the consequences of either and both and anything. When   you  are away, I miss  you . I want to know what  you  are doing. I want to know what  you  are thinking. I want to know that  you  know that I am still here, And desperate to be with  you  again. Moments are unbearable In the silent spaces between our breaths, In the empty hours of parting, In the cluttered chasms of thought. And I want to be with  you , Scared, missing, and incomplete. I want  you  and all of the desperate consequences. I want  you  with me forever.